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June 6, 2018

How to say goodbye to the deceased at a funeral

For many people, a funeral, especially if a loved one has died, causes a lot of dubious emotions, such as fear, anxiety. It is not surprising, since in the sacrament of farewell to the deceased there is something mysterious and supernatural. Stories of the elderly that one wrong action can lead to the wanderings of the soul of the deceased or to troubles with the living, calmness and confidence in this matter are not attached.
No one knows how it really is, but how to say goodbye to a dead person at a funeral is necessary, since death is an integral part of life and anyone is waiting for a day when he will lose someone.


  1. How to say goodbye to the deceased at a funeral.
  2. How to say goodbye to the deceased at the grave.
  3. What to say at the coffin (examples of phrases).

How to say goodbye to the deceased at a funeral

All over the world, when a person leaves this world, a special ceremony of parting with him passes. Thus, the living express respect to the deceased. Each nation has its own burial rites, which can differ significantly from each other. But one thing still unites – during the funeral, relatives, friends and just acquaintances come to say goodbye to the deceased.

Икебана на гроб 11

Ikebana on the coffin

In addition, the funeral reminds everyone that there are no immortal people and this fate awaits everyone, which makes many people rethink their views on their existence. The funeral rite also acts as a kind of farewell and reminder to the living, that it is not worth spending it in vain.
The Orthodox faith considers the process of death as a transition to life in the Kingdom of Heaven. For this, the dying person needs to be prepared. So, the rite of farewell consists of the following stages:

  1. According to the canons of the Orthodox Church, before the death it is necessary to perform the ritual of the Sobor.
  2. The dying man must confess that he may be forgiven of his sins.
  3. After the confession, the clergyman communes his parishioner on the deathbed.
  4. Farewell to death. You can read the prayers as a priest, or a relative or a close one.
  5. When the person has died, it is necessary to wash with water, then wipe, put on the body a funeral costume and cover with a shroud.
  6. Before carrying the coffin with the deceased from the house, the minister of the church spends the coffin and the deceased sprinkling, reading the corresponding prayers.
  7. Immediately before burial, another rite is performed – the funeral service. It is believed that only by fulfilling these rites, the deceased will be able to attain eternal life.

How to say goodbye to the deceased at the grave

After all the rituals held at home, the deceased is sent to the cemetery. How to properly say goodbye to the deceased, do not know everything, some points are still worth taking into account:

  • Native should not go before the coffin.
  • After the burial, you can eat something, and you can also wake up.
  • The deceased is kissed in a crown on his forehead and hands.
  • You can not bury it, leaving flowers or an icon in the coffin.
  • Saying goodbye, the face of the deceased is covered and the coffin is lowered into the grave on special oblong fabric flaps, after which they are distributed to people. Blood relatives should not take them.
  • The coffin should be lowered so that the deceased lay head to the east.
  • Those who came to lead the deceased in the last way, throw money into the grave, it is believed that it is necessary to repay the deceased, and land. The first to do this should be relatives.
  • When the funeral is completed, it is necessary to hold a wake, which is arranged by relatives on the day of burial, after commemoration is held for 3, 9 and 40 days, and then every year from the day of death.

What to say at the coffin: examples

Seeing the deceased in a better world, one must not only do everything right, but also say farewell words. How to say goodbye to the deceased at the coffin is not known to everyone, many are lost, what can you say to a dead person? But the rite is a ritual and the last words addressed to a person whom the living world has lost forever must sound from the mouth of the mourner.
Certain strict rules, like what to say the last words of the deceased, no. The main thing is that they go from the bottom of the heart and be sincere, especially if they are addressed not just to a friend, but to a close person or relative. For the deceased, the most important thing is that the memory should be kept.
Five examples that will help you find out what to say in front of the coffin:

  1. «Rest in peace, Eugene. Forgive us all alive…».
  2. «Farewell, dear Nadezhda Petrovna. The memory of you will always be with me…».
  3. «Let your soul rest. And I will pray for you…».
  4. «The deceased is eternal rest, but to the living infinite patience. Earth rest in peace…».
  5. «My soul mourns for you. Forgive those who offended you…».

Perhaps, this knowledge will help to cope with the loss of an expensive person. Losing a loved one always causes a lot of mental pain and suffering to the living. It is worth remembering that now the deceased is in a better world, and is in the heart of his family, while they remember about him.

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